spring

i doubt anyone will see/read this but i just wanted to give a shout-out to SPRING ... i'm so not a cold weather/winter person so, this is a real time of zippity doo-dah for me ... so nice to see flowers growing and trees slowly becoming green and all ...

dead o' Winter

So, we're just post-New Years' hoopla, post-Xmas hoopla and thank the gods ... it was excruciating being around my immediate family and a hand-ful of cousins/relatives that my mother crammed into her tiny 2-bedroom house ... the eventual tense drama ensued but I had the option to just leave and come back home ... which I eventually did ...

Twas nice, don't get me wrong, to see my daughter whom I don't get to see as often as I should ... (i'll save that debacle for another blog entry ...)She is coming along nicely having gone from newborn/infant to sassy-mouthed goth-hipster ... what a long strange trip, it's been ...

I've had a really nasty case of bronchitis and have been doing not much other than coughing and spitting out nasty ugly phlegm and gods know what ... ughhh.... TMI, i'm sorry ...

I've done more fantasizing about living in South Florida or the desert South West than any other time / Winter ... I think when my kids are both older, I shall attempt to move to one of those 2 locales ... the harsh dry cold really is ... killing me slowly and painfully ... as dramatic as it sounds ...

A bit annoyed with the money I just spent on 2 bottles of Australian red wine that are both fairly mediocre and just 'meh' ... One has way too much cabernet sauv. in it and the other is all ethanol/anti-septic taste with very little berry-soul to it ... not all Aussie red wine is "wolf-pussy"(my favorite adjective for reallllyyy good wine/food/whatever...)

Some is just as painfully mediocre/bad as its American counterparts...

I'm blending the 2, 50/50 and coming up with an acceptable result (try this when you have a few bottles of crap wine or beer --- you often will end up with a superior taste / experience / buzz ...)

Tommorow, I go see the oral surgeon for my T.M.J. "internal derangement" (I had to chuckle for a bit ...)It's something that's been bothering me mightily for a few years now and is getting worse, it seems, by the year so i'm finally doing something about it ...It causes head-aches, ringing in my ears and stiff-ness in my neck all because the nerves that affect those areas run right through the area where the TMJ is ...

I have neglected this blog for a year and I vow to stop that trend and write much more often ... it's easier to, in the Winter doldrums ... am trapped indoors much more often ...Much more time to think, unfortunately about everything that ...sucks .....

old loves gone ashen borderline gray

I just signed up for a blog here after reading an old gf's blog about her borderline personality disorder and resultant problems and issues ... I had a unique bond with her years ago , unique to say the least ... She has since married and moved far away ... but I miss her mind and unique personnage in general ... We had excellent astrological chemistry to say the least ... I've not found anyone quite like her in the years since I last saw her ... She kind've flaked out on me and told me that (in so many words) she was too good for me and deserved more material comforts than I could provide her with ... I was devastated , needless to say ... ughhhh ...
But on her own blog here on blogspot, I can see how miserable she is nowadays ... doesn't seem to be happy with her husband nor her living arrangements, etcetra ... She doesn't seem to see her daughter much as she deferred custody to her ex husband ... She mentions taking a strong anti-psychotic medicine in the blog and I guess i'm not surprised but it's a bummer ... a bummer that she's THAT ill ... I reached out to her earlier this evening by sending her a message on the IM she's on ... she pretended to not know whom I was and then abruptly went offline ... :((((((((((((((((
I miss my friend / lover and cosmic comrade ...